t s u b a s a reservoir chronicle

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Heck, I feel stupid. I just spent 10 minutes trying to force the ink cartridges of my new HP printer into somewhere that isn't even where they're supposed to go. But yeah well my sis figured it out in the end so all's well.

Except you know, installing this printer will take 2GB of space. This means I only have 1GB of space left. I want to kill myself, seriously. Goodbye, Sims Nightlife (yes, I have not even installed it yet. Since last year Christmas, you know). Goodbye, ~~illegal~~ insane mp3 downloading. Though I'll probably delete all my Tsubasa clips to make space T_T It should clear at least 1 GB for me.

Hmm the installation is only at 68%. My com is lagging lah. It's slow. I want a new com. Except I would sooner drink a blended rat (what I saw those poor people on Fear Factor: New York City do. Joe put an ENTIRE rat into the blender! And switched it on! Like ew ew ew!) than lose all the things I have currently stored in the hard drive. I can't imagine what shall happen to me if, like those who keep complaining about their computers crashing, I encounter a 'crashed' computer. I would probably sink into depression, and bite everyone I see...

Oh yay it's done. Now to plug in the USB cable.

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Bloody hell! They think I a lot of USB ports issit?? I only have 2! Now where does the cable for my Zen Neeon go, I ask you?

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The stupid printer is too long T_T The cable wire isn't long enough to extend the entire width of my com table, and THEN the length of the printer to reach the port on the extreme left. Why couldn't they have simply built the ports on the right, anyway??

I turned the printer sideways. It looks ridiculous.

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Now it's gone back to installing. Hmm I think Kelly Poon does Mei Li Ben Nu Ren much better than Coco Lee does.

Back to school tomorrow. Don't want to wake up early leh. My eyebags are severely pronounced. WHAT CAN I DO TO REPAIR THE DAMAGE?

Still only 94%. Retarded com. Only 256MB! Good gracious.

Erm, it is STILL at 94%. I'll go out and eat a biscuit.

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Liew, where is the Tin Tam Original?? My sister was carrying it 5 minutes ago!! Aiyah whatever lah eat Hello Panda.

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I got pineapple instead. I don't understand why.

OH MY GOD! THE PRINTER IS SO FREAKIING SLOW! A snail could crawl faster than that! Oohhhh, I'm outraged.

Lingga says @#%$! at 6:47 PM

Saturday, March 25, 2006

lingga -

[noun]:

A person who is constantly high

'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Hahaha got it off Kel's. I tried it a few times afterwards and I had "Banshee-like", "Person of questionable sanity who starts their own cult", and something about green breakast cereal. Cute.

Lingga says @#%$! at 10:35 PM

Meet the Parents' Session today! The waiting was atrocious. And when we finally got to Mdm Neo in the queue, she pronounced me a pleasant girl and dismissed us, just like that, after about an hour of waiting! I am rather indignant at being short-changed. Haha. My mom talked to Eric Tay too and he insisted on calling me Deng Yi Ling. He always calls Amy Yi Ling and not Pan Yi Ling. Why can't I ever be Yi Ling? Oh no, I must be Deng Yi Ling, because he feels so song calling out my surname for 2 years!

So yes where was I in Date Movie? Shit, sequence of events getting fuzzy. Err, after the corpse frenching, I think Grant proposed OH YES! He brought her to a jewellery shop, but before that they were near a rubbish dump and THE PRODUCERS WERE SO MEAN THEY SPOOFED MICHAEL JACKSON! They made this guy with a powedered face, big nose and shoulder-length black hair wander around trying to lure a little boy away with a lollipop. Hahaha then the little boy's mother appeared and beat him up in the background while Grant and Julia were conversing.

Next, Grant and Julia and Julia's family pile into a huge RV (which I think they borrowed directly from Meet The Fockers) and go off to Fonckyerdoder Island. Bernie (was his name Bernie? Bernie and Roz? Ah heck I can't be bothered) and Jack, Julia's father, have a game of basketball, and as Bernie runs towards Jack and does a lay up, his hairy, sweaty chest smashes against Jack's face and slides all the way up with the elevation of the jump, and then for the next 199 seconds the camera centres in on Jack's mouth which is spilling with Bernie's sweat and tufts of his chest hair, complete with the thunderous roaring of gushing water. Oh, GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS.

Roz kept rubbing Bernie's head into her boobs whenever they got excited -.- Oh, hahaha! As Bernie was announcing to everyone that Grant had lost his virginity to the housekeeper many years back, instead of Isabella, the busty Spanish lady in Meet The Fockers, who walks in, it is this sexy Latin man with a freaking tight ass wrapped in mini denim shorts bearing a tray of cocktails, as he bends over to serve the drinks he shakes his ass at Grant for like, a full 30 seconds! Hahaha!

And and and! In one scene, Roz (a sex therapist for old people) asks Julia's mom how long it's been since she's been intimate with her husband. She sighs, goes, "A very long time," then lifts her sari and spreads her legs and we see cobwebs in between her thighs! Like! Bloody hell! Dis! Tur! Bing!

But hahaha I admit I rather enjoyed that little bit of sick humour.

Then is a scene at The Wedding Planner's. I think they stuffed a turkey into the pants of the actress spoofing J Lo. On each side of her butt. It was ridiculous and her butt kept getting into the way so she kept knocking things over.

Next enters best friend Andy, played by Sophie Monk whom I mistook for Carmen Electra, they are both blond and busty and hot. They are at a poolside and Grant wants Julia to meet Andy, who is a tanned bronze Goddess (and has heavily mascaraed eyes). She is gorgeous in a tiny gold bikini and stilettos and as the Pussycat Dolls wail Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me? she dives into the pool in a perfect arc with her stilettos still on (I am oddly fixated on this fact, I am unsure why), and if I were Julia right at that moment I would throw myself onto the pool and drown.

So anyway. They sit down somewhere where Andy goes, "Excuse me while I get these... wet clothes off" and peels off her bikini. BEAR IN MIND SHE IS WEARING ONLY HER BIKINI. Then she sits with her legs crossed and arms folded, and gives a self-satisfied smile. Around that moment, the screen switches to a familiar scene where there is someone who looks oddly like Paris Hilton in a skimpy black bikini strutting about with huge burgers in her hands and lounging on the front of a sleek black car. Sophie Monk improvises on Paris's moves and even slaps the burgers onto the windscreen joyously, but not before rubbing them all over herself and making us see for sure why the movie was rated NC-16.

Apparently, if you haven't yet deduced, or are unable to, Andy was once Grant's fiancee and had, because she was not yet ready to settle down, broken their engagement. 3 weeks ago. Now she is back and determined to steal Grant away again! Because after all he is still cute, even though he climaxes weird. He looks like a combi of Brad Pitt in Meet Joe Black (the best Brad had ever looked. My God, don't you want to SCREAM at what he's doing to his hair now?) and Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic (WHY, Leo, WHY? Why did you go insane and cut off all your fringe, making you look old and fat like you smoke cigarettes all day long?).

Herrm from then on there aren't as many disturbing events worth mentioning anymore. So I shall just briefly run through the series of events.

OH WAIT! There is a simply hilarious scene where they spoof Mr and Mrs Smith. The counselling session. Grant is a DEAD RINGER for Brad Pitt and his crewcut, and while Julia doesn't quite look like Angelina Jolie, then again who would, and I would get the DVD just to watch that scene again! Hahaha I think it's simply amusing. I shan't attempt to describe it to leave you all in suspense :) Are you not dying to blow $9.50 on the movie just because you cannot stand the suspense??

So for the rest of the movie, Julia gets all insecure about Grant abandoning her for Andy, and when she catches them kissing on the wedding day (a clever manipulation by Andy, who simply grabs Grant and smooches him), after having the camera film her try to pop a zit the size of a tap for 15 minutes, and grossing the entire audience out to such an extent that I dared not even look from behind my popcorn (THE FORCE OF THE ERUPTION BROKE THE MIRROR AND SENT HER SPRAWLING BACK OK! OK!), she runs off in tears in a too-large wedding gown that she lets Andy purposely talk her into buying. And then she breaks up with him. She almost gets married to Nicky, the guy with long curly hair and hey! looks like Bo Bice after a few months of roughing it out on the streets, but upon realising that it is Grant she loves, her father stops the session at the ROM and she takes off to look for Grant, who is waiting for her atop the block she lives in. Expectedly, she runs up the stairs just as Grant is riding the lift down to the ground floor, dejected with her no-show, and they miss each other. He lets out a frustrated shout at the doors before Julia, who has collapsed on the railing on the rooftop, due to disappointment upon not seeing him, falls over as the railing breaks and lands in his arms.

All is happy again!

They get married ala Pam and Greg Meet The Fockers style, and "Owen Wilson" turns up too late to marry them, so Hitch does it instead. It is also then that we see the Ancient Lady making out with Jinxes the Cat, who is in a suit. I hope someone's remembered to bathe Jinxes after his little incident with Grandma Jones, and wash his mouth.

And they live happily ever after.

Oh toosh I've finished my summary :) If this were a test I would have failed. Pray remember this entry doesn't sound HALF as crude as what I've seen.

My new printer is absurdly bulky lor. Oh, my GOD, about 45cm in length! I knew there had to be a catch for the price ($99). It does NOT fit on my table!

I'm supposed to be all inspired after the Meet The Parents Session today but instead I only finished a)(i) of a geog essay question and my WS 3H. Die le lah.

Lingga says @#%$! at 10:16 PM

Thursday, March 23, 2006

I wasn't planning to blog but I shan't procrastinate, darling :)

Ok, it's the 4th day of school and I'm getting used to how life used to be. I want to eat Long John's fries.

So about Date Movie. See, the whole theatre consisted of Wen and I and this other Eurasian couple. JUST the four of us. I've never been to a theatre where you could count the number of people in there with one hand.

Oh, there's also the guy in the showing room, where they project the movie onto the screen. At first when Wen and I entered Cinema 6 we were like, erm, did they tell us the wrong cinema? because it was completely dark and deserted. We were all apprehensive about going in and sitting down because HELLO, what if we get snatched away and eaten up by the upholstery?? But after a few moments of deliberating we spotted the guy in the room up there ("Hello, hello!") and felt more relieved, so we went and got seats smack in the middle of the cinema, then started snacking on popcorn and ice lemon tee (Wenwen, glutton she is, was greedily eating while we were still at the popcorn stand!).

I shall start at the beginning of the movie. There is this humongous, terribly obese girl called Julia Jones who wakes up and scribbles in her (duh) diary, called, (duh-uh) Julia Jones' Diary. She decides she doesn't want to be despondent and pessimistic about her fuller figure and, having lost her mind, flings open the doors, throws herself into the streets and dances to Milkshake (yes, THAT Milkshake. The one Faris always sang in Sec 1).

The sadistic producers, having decided that the best entertainment for the viewers is to gross us out, makes her do all sorts of ridiculous dance moves which cause various parts of her body to jiggle/bounce. Her boobs become separate life forms on their own. There is like one scene where she sees this group of hot construction workers and goes over and starts trying to get their attention with her "slick" moves. A gust of wind lifts up her skirt (ala Fiona in Shrek 2 if I remember correctly) and she starts rotating her butt in a circular motion, batting her eyelashes, and the camera shows us her underwear and disgusting fat suit.

It is as traumatizing for one construction worker as it is for us, because he loads his nail gun and shoots himself in his head.

Another scene has her jiggling all she has in front of a taxi driver in his cab, and when she gets really excited that he seems to be responding, flips around and lands backfacing him, and her boobs like slung themselves over her shoulders and ended up on her back. (!!DISTURBING!!)

Her own father wants her to marry this guy who lives on the streets called Nicky because no one else will want her and then work in their deli, and adds to her low self-esteem by insulting her. He squirts mustard on her mole(s) with several strands of hair sticking out ("Julia, your mole is growing another mole.") claiming it will help. Her mom is Indian and her sister is an Indian Jap-wannabe who parades around the set in a sports bra and hair Chun Li-style.

So yes, she decides she needs to go find Hitch, the date doctor, who brought together Jennifer and Brad and Jennifer and Ben and Angelina and Billy etc. Hitch comes up to roughly around my knees. He checks her teeth and flosses for her and manages to uncover an entire CHICKEN WING (!) from her mouth. Then he convinces her she needs to have a facelift Extreme Makeover style and instead, brings her to a garage where all his brudders work. They then get to work on her. Liposuction is done by sucking out the fats in her butt (a huge, droopy, frightening thing) into a large bottle labelled World's Worst Food: Mayonnaise (or something like that).

Then she puts herslf on the Bachelor, and sees the same guy (Grant Fockyerdodder) she saw at the deli one day and fell in love with. Of course they fall for each other and go on a date, and oh my god Grant acted out his climax at the beginning of the date and it was totally STUNNING (by stunning I do not mean in a good way) and made both my and Wen's jaws drop and wish we could crawl out fo the theatre, but to understand what I have experienced you will have to watch the movie.

So anyway they make their way home to Julia's home and have sex and everything, and after they are done and are lying in bed, there is a short but hilarious exchange between this ancient 80-year-old lady (who later hooks up with Jinxes, the Jones' cat, but I'll get to that), living opposite Julia, and the 2 of them.

Ancient Lady: (leaning out of her window, smiling coyly) She was faking it*, Grant.
Julia: (looks at Grant, horrified, desperately shakes her head)
Ancient Lady: (purrs) But I wasn't.
Wen and I: (jaws separate from mouth and land on floor)
Ancient Lady: (starts acting all aroused) MEOWWWW~ MEOWWWWW~

* by it I mean her orgasm.

Ok what happens after that? Oh, meet the parents session. The whole thing screws up, obviously. Grant uncorks the champagne, the cork flies and hits Julia's grandma's urn, and the whole thing falls on the floor and shatters, revealing a half-mummified corpse that is all srunched up and decomposed. Its tongue is sticking out straight for whatever reason, and for the same UNKNOWN reasons, the Jones' warped cat Jinxes scrambles over to Grandma Jones' remains and starts frenching, tongue and everything. Everyone is horrified and goes "Jinxy, NO! Bad Jinxy, come here!" but the stupid cat goes on tongue-ing some half rotted woman and ignores everyone.

I AM DISTRAUGHT I have to take a break. I shall continue another day this is too weird for me T_T

Lingga says @#%$! at 9:06 PM

Sunday, March 19, 2006

I said I wouldn't blog! But whatever man.

I'm quite reluctant to recount Date Movie right now because it shall take an absurdly long time, and I do want to savour the last few hours left in my short-lived March Holiday (speaking of March, I hate March. Everyone gives birth during then). But ohmyfreakinggod, the movie was INCREDIBLY TREMENDOUSLY RIDICULOUSLY OBSCENELY crude. If that sort of content is what I have been waiting for all my life (fine, not true, but still) to watch when I turn 16, I am sorely disappointed. Date Movie is VULGAR and disturbing. Do NOT watch it. Do NOT, even worse, watch it even when I have detailed to you the events which you will encounter in the movie, unlike spastic Chia Chia who now wants the DVD thanks to me.

In a few days lah hor then I will recount.

English
~~. essay on library materials benefitting me~~
. essay to be titled SPACE (I'm thinking of hushing it up and praying she won't remember)
~~. preston vocab shit. I'm only on practice 52~~ I have given up on Practice 85. Whatever man.

Chemistry
~~. assortment of chem worksheets~~
~~. finish and mark chem theory~~
. revise mole and electrolysis for topic test

Biology
~~. timetable~~
(oh you know, I jsut realised I have ALL the sec 3 chapters in my notebook. So I don't have to do no more sitnking mindmaps/make any notes :) therefore)
~~. sec 3 chapters~~

Geography
. 5 1/2 more essay questions

ELEMENTARY AND ADDITIONAL MATHEMATICS
. 3 a math papers :)
. half an e math paper
. cumulative frequency corrections
~~. a math file corrections~~
. find a content page for a math file

Social Studies
. insignificant mindmaps, which, sadly, I will attempt to do today
~~. essay question on british welfare system~~
~~. essay question on population~~

Literature
~~. arrange lit file! produce a lit file!~~
. print content page, fill in content page

Higher Chinese
~~. 1 li jie wen da~~
~~. jian bao 2~~
. half a li jie wen da

I don't care! Today I will finish that half of an E Math paper, do my social studies mindmap and finish my li jie wen da, and get ready for school! Everything else can just go and eat shit.

:)

Lingga says @#%$! at 3:37 PM

Saturday, March 18, 2006

Ohhh I just saw a lovely questionaire on Kel's blog. Will kill time until I am ready to go bathe and meet Wenwen.

The instructions read:
Go to the music player of your choice and put it on shuffle. Ask the following questions and use the song titles as your answers. NO CHEATING!

(I'm using my Zen Neeon)

How does the world see me?
Song: Shou Le Dian Shang
Artist: A Sang
Comments: ...Lame shit. 16 years of hyperventilating and bouncing around, and the world thinks I am hurt.

Will I have a happy life?
Song: Sore Ga, Ai Deshou (That, Is Probably Love)
Artist: No idea, but the singer's got a great voice and I totally dig the song. From FMP Fumoffu.
Comments: That's good :)

What do my friends really think of me?
Song: Free
Artist: Corrinne May
Comments: o.O

You led the revolution
You left your legacy
Embraced the struggle
in the face of mortality

Oh my God, I had no idea you guys thought so highly of me. Call me at your next strike/riot/protest, k?

Do people secretly lust after me?
Song: (HAHA) Shame On Me
Artist: Ryan Cabrerra
Comments: The answer is obviously YES, what with me being an egomaniac and the likes. Very apt. I think my Zen is secrectly alive.

How can I make myself happy?
Song: I Drive Myself Crazy
Artist: A1
Comments: Alright. That is a very obvious hint, Zen Neeon. Apparently I am only too desperate to create happiness in my life.

What should I do with my life?
Song: Mu Dan Jiang
Artist: Nan Quan Ma Ma
Comments: Ok, I am clueless. Perhaps I am to take up poetry and put my hair in a bun. As it is Peony Lake, the only image I can conjure up is of Tang Dynasty poets yin shi zuo le-ing in a little tavern by the West Lake. Let me look at the lyrics to decipher the cryptic meanings...

(Oh shit the words are really chim)

Okay. They are talking about fish. And about catching the moon and starlight for Grandpa to go with his wine (and for Grandma to brew soup). I do not think my Zen is hinting for me to become a farmer.

Why should life be full of so much pain?
Song: Spin
Artist: Darren Hayes
Comments: (Kel, that thing about Avril Lavigne is completely random! I really do like Let Go. Pity about the second one though) Cryptic too.

Governments elected nobody votes
Politically correct isn't that a joke?
We censor music then give children guns
On CNN
Still fightin' to death over Jerusalem
Four letter disease still makes us run
Can't comprehend that you can die from Love

Can I start things over
And change your mind
Can I sing a melody
Press rewind
Can I move your feet make your heart skip a beat
Can a simple tune flow through you?

When the music feels like this
When you lose control you gotta go with it
Ten feet high
Flyin' above the sky
Your problems don't exist
When music feels like this

No money left in Africa
Starvin' to death
In Bosnia we close our eyes and hide a nation cries
And In the West
TV Possessed and weight obsessed
The media dissects, infects
We think real life is reality TV

Alright, go figure.

How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Song: HOLLABACK GIRL
Artist: Gwen Stefani
Comments: Self-explanatory. But here's a hint anyway.

Let me hear you say this shit is bananas
B-A-N-A-N-A-S
(This shit is bananas)
(B-A-N-A-N-A-S)

Will I ever have children?
Song: Xue Lai De Shi Hou
Artist: Alec Su
Comments: Rigght. This song is about pining for a lost love and past memories when the snow falls. If I apply that directly, I am guessing the answer is no.

Oh wait. Here's a part about impulsiveness during youth. Perhaps I shall be an unwed mom at 18 :)

Will I die happy?
Song: Down
Artist: Lin Jun Jie
Comments:

No, I will not. The song foretells that I will die of unrequited love. But ok lah, I will be doing it voluntarily, so I suppose...

Why did you fake it
Why did we kiss?

What is some good advice for me?
Song: Bie Ren Dou Shuo Wo Men Hui Tian Chang Di Jiu
Artist: Wu Yin Liang Pin
Comments: >.< So now I will have short-lived relationships huh??

What is happiness?
Song: For You
Artist: 5566
Comments: Apparently my definition of happiness is being a doormat for my boyfriend -.-

What is my favourite fetish?
Song: Beautiful Soul
Artist: Jesse McCartney
Comments: OH! This is so apt! This whole song is about pretty faces (or not wanting them), significant others and long lost crushes :) (Ok the long lost crushes part applies only to me, because everytime I hear this song I'd think Jesse was a crush I used to have; there is no such crush, I have speaking figuratively) It is a very destressing song, I love it.

How will I be remembered?
Song: Jin Tian Bu Hui Jia
Artist: David Tao
Comments: ! I will be a juvie delinquent who runs away from home, like that little 10 year old boy who took his bike and his mom's money and slept in playgrounds? Erm, so NOT I say. I will never sleep in the streets and I cant cycle anyway.

Aww it's over! I shall have to bathe now or be late. Tata.

Lingga says @#%$! at 12:36 AM

HAHA I KNEW IT, BLOGGER YOU VILE, DISGUSTING SLOTH, YOU TRIED TO EAT MY ENTRY BUT I'M ONE STEP BEFORE YOU NEH NEH NEH

Anyway, my mom gave me 2 Eng Wah movie vouchers yesterday. Meaning I can go watch a movie at Eng Wah for free (by 31 March). And also enjoy a free popcorn and drink. Because I have a voucher for that, too. Now don't you regret not sucking up to me? :)

Alright, maybe not, because I extended an invitation to Wenwen already :))

(Fine I shall stop :)ing myself silly)

Right. Free movie. Awesome, you say. And popcorn too! But what the hell, it's March and guess what? The movies suck.

Seriously. I realised that a few weeks ago. All the good ones (for example, BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN) have ratings. More than half of the movies screened at EW Sun Plaza (which is where I am due tomorrow) are rated NC-16 and above! Wen and I are contemplating wriggling our way through to get tickets to an NC-16 flick, because after all, technically we DO turn 16 this year. Just, like, a couple of months or so, round up can le lah. I'm positive all I have to do is to wear huge, outrageous, dangling earrings and use chim words. Wenwen, problematic lah, but perhaps she could tiptoe to project a false impression of height :)

Oh yes, back to the problem of a lack of movies to watch. What if I shall be forced to watch, FOR EXAMPLE, Yours, Mine and Ours? I would slit my wrists. Anyone who has access to a television set would understand.

My options are further limited by the fact that I have to be at school by 5pm to watch the band concert. (AMBience III issit? Ok I have no idea, seriously. I bought the ticket to support Sasa and her 30 second solo) Therefore the time slots available are from like, 12 to 2. And the only movies which I can catch during that time slots are:

*drumroll*
Date Movie NC-16 (you cannot be serious. did anyone SEE the clips on the MRT?)
The Shaggy Dog (bloody. hell.)
~~YOURS MINE AND OURS~~
I Not Stupid 2 (which I have watched before. I cried myself silly)
V For Vendetta NC-16 (I am not paying to watch Natalie Portman parade around bald. yes, I discriminate against bald people, so what NEH NEH NEH)

Ok, I cannot be bothered to recall. If you eliminate all the M-18 R-21 non-english ones it should look something like that. Tentatively Wen's and my choice are hovering above Date Movie. If we should be caught and hauled out of the cinema for attempting to pass ourselves off as 16 year olds, we will thus be forced to watch The Shaggy Dog, which is PG.

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Oh whatever. At least I get free popcorn right. They say Eng Wah's popcorn is good.

Lingga says @#%$! at 12:13 AM

Thursday, March 16, 2006

I DISLIKE ANG XUELING T_T She does ALL her homework. She CATEGORIZES her homework. Everytime I read her blog I end up feeling like the lazy, procrastinating, silly person I am T_______T

She FINISHED two A Math papers, whereas I have not even touched ONE. Not even CONTEMPLATED touching one! And she is upset with herself for not studying. Bloody hell lah T_____________T I want to break down and dissolve into tears. What am I doing with my holidays??

Ok, I shall make a homework list too. A categorized homework list ala Xueling!

English
. essay on library materials benefitting me
. essay to be titled SPACE
. preston vocab shit. I'm only on practice 52.

Chemistry
~~. assortment of chem worksheets~~
~~. finish and mark chem theory~~
. revise mole and electrolysis for topic test

Biology
. timetable
(oh you know, I jsut realised I have ALL the sec 3 chapters in my notebook. So I don't have to do no more sitnking mindmaps/make any notes :) therefore)
~~. sec 3 chapters~~

Geography
. 7 more essay questions

ELEMENTARY AND ADDITIONAL MATHEMATICS
. 2 a math papers :)
. 2 e math papers :)
. e math file corrections
~~. a math file corrections~~

Social Studies
. insignificant mindmap
~~. essay question on british welfare system~~
. essay question on population

Literature
. arrange lit file! produce a lit file!

Higher Chinese
~~. 1 li jie wen da~~
~~. jian bao 2~~
. finish that stupid half of a compre which I have been deterred from doing because it is incomprehensible.

Oh I don't get what's wrong with me. I like to feel organized, lah :) And I think I have become fond of the :) smiley more than the =) smiley. Not the (: one because that is so unbelievably common, and I don't get the hype about it. :) Therefore I shall :) my way through the holidays!

PS: Oh, The Princess Diaries 7 is released in US on 28 March 06. While I know it will take some time to arrive in Singapore, perhaps if you looked hard enough you might be able to purchase it in time for me to receive it on my birthday :)

Lingga says @#%$! at 6:02 PM

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

I can't find my KFC coupons T_T

Doing Preston Vocab shit once again. I have no life lah. I also started on my third Geog question just now. I finished parts a) and b) and couldn't take any more population yada anymore. I think it took me 1 hour.

Oh yes, I looked at Weiwen's blog for the first time. That guy is ultra weird. What is wrong with him?

Lingga says @#%$! at 9:41 PM

OH MY GOD, I FOUND THIS ON FANFICTION.NET
______________

A/N - Thanks to my friend Naz and the Army of Undead Drazars' for inspiration. And Kyle (who I've actually never met). This is a parody; Jane Austen owns Pride and Prejudice. Flames are yummy. The Bonnets' are the Bennett's; I just think Bonnet sounds better.

Summery: Darcy is really a super evil time lord of doom. Read between the lines, people!

It was a quiet day in merry olde Regency England, and Mrs Bonnet was trying desperately to marry off her daughters, all who seemed to have some kind of social or mental problem.

"Oh hello, I'm a quaint essential battleaxe and these are my uncommonly pretty daughters, would you care to meet them?" Mrs Bonnet asked candidly, even though she knew that that didn't happen on the first page of the actual book. Kitty Bonnet dared to cough. Suddenly her father appeared, shouting at her manically like an escaped psychopath.

"HOW DARE YOU COUGH? WHAT THE HELL GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO COUGH? STOP FAKING IT!"

Kitty burst into tears, and ran away, never to be mentioned in this or any other book again.

Mr Bonnet bowed to Mr Darcy and his wife, and then he vanished, leaving normal conversation to resume.

"Jolly oh then, how spiffing! I'm Mr Darcy, the new resident of Crappy Park, and I'm the evil time lord of doom and commanding officer of the Undead Drazars'. Any of you fancy marrying me for my extraordinary amount of money?"

A few of the Bonnet girls shrugged.

"I won't!" Declared Elizabeth, who was sooooo obviously about to fall in love with him, "You're far too pompous! I'm going on a walk! TTFN."

The other fifty or so Bonnet girls were doing whatever they usually did whilst Austen centred on Elizabeth. Mr Darcy was being ever so busy with looking like a pompous twit.

A few chapters past, and Elizabeth suddenly realised how deeply sensitive and emotional the commander of the brigade of zombie ravens/ time lord of doom actually was. Emotional music played, and she ran towards him in slow motion. Darcy just stood there, unaware of what was going on. The evil time lord of doom knew that he still had a few moments until Operation Destroy Regency England commenced, so he let her indulge in whatever it was she had to ramble on about.

"Oh Mr Darcy!" She cried, flinging herself at him, her arms wrapping around his neck "I love you!"

"I love you, too," he said, because that makes "a lot of sense". "But it's time for me to show no mercy and burn this city to the ground. Sorry and all that, old girl."

Elizabeth shrugged. "Never mind, I'll just get off with that Mr Bingly – he's gorgeous!"

Suddenly Jeeves, the butler entered carrying a letter tray. Elizabeth got so happy she almost wet herself. Mr Darcy seemed to have disappeared.

"Excuse me, madam, but this letter just arrived from your sister Miss Lydia."

In a frenzied excitement, Elizabeth tore the envelope open and read it's contents:

Dear sucker,

I got off with a rich bloke and you didn't.

Nah-nah-nee-nah-nah.

Your ever-loving sister,

Lydia

P.S It was Mr Bingly.

"Oh well," said Elizabeth to herself, shrugging. "At least now it's open to sequels."

She spent the last few sentences of the book laughing at how one-day schoolchildren would be forced to read and analyse EVERY SINGLE WORD of her oh-so-strange life.

"WOO HA HA HAAA."

The End

A/N (again) - this is the result of debating classic literature whilst high on sugar.

HAHA FUCKING HILARIOUS!!! Those who've read the book would understand. Hahahaha.

PS: Oh. Don't ask me why I was in the Jane Austen section in Fanfiction.net. I was bored.

Lingga says @#%$! at 6:56 PM

AHHHHH QIDDY IS SUCH A RELIGIOUS (treated or regarded with a devotion and scrupulousness appropriate to worship) BLOGGER. She blogs about everything in school! Makes me feel so guilty about my lazy attitude!

Shall get on about X-Country, no more procrastination anymore hurhurhur.

Let's see. My mom drove 3 other kids who were not her children to school that day. Amy, Kum Boon and Jin Ning hitched a ride with me to MacRitchie Reservoir.

Oh yes, Eric Tay was dressed like.. like.. an illegal chinese immigrant! HAHA I don't know why he looks like that but he was wearing this striped polo tee that was tucked in tucked in and striaght legged jeans, which, to his credit, weren't even those faded light blue ones which look recycled from the 80s. They were those dark blue stone-washed ones with, er, I have no idea how to describe them, lighter shades of blue on the thighs? Aiyah, you KNOW what I'm talking about. It just looked quite wrong put on Eric Tay. I think maybe he's just the illegal immigrant from China type. Oh oh, he also had this tiny Adiddas (bloody hell can never spell that correctly) bag he was carrying and Amy was like hissing "ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT FORM CHINA! THEY ALWAYS CARRY THOSE LITTLE BAGS SLUNG OVER THEIR BACKS!" Mean girl lah, she XD

And Jia saw Lim Shioh Hwee and Eric Tay (I am unsure of why I insist on calling my teachers by their full names) standing together under the tent in the morning, and she said they looked like an illegal immigrant couple from China! She was wearing her cancer patient outfit again, lots of lace and frills, and a big hat. It's her protective gear. From the sun I mean.

Oh, enough bitching. X-Country was quite lac this year. The girls only had to do 3.2km while the boys, poor things they are, did 4.8km XD I dislike running on ground that is not solid.

When I finished the forest trail, it opened up to a HUMONGOUS stretch of expressway that I was going to have to clear to finish the run. The sun was being horrible, as usual, and as I wiped the sweat from my forehead and strained my eyes to see the furthest I could, all I saw were -

- more sweaty, exhausted people trudging wearily down the lane, each thinking what the heck why is it not ending.

I joined them and I think 15 minutes later came across this St John's boy who was screaming for all he was worth, 100m left 100m left! So Nimisha, whom I had met on the way, and I were like, Shall we? and started sprinting, my God, full on sprinting, insistent on reaching the finishing line, and about 5 min later we realised, Hey, the guy lied.

It was then I went, When he said 100m left... and this other St John's boy replied, Yes, 100m left.

I hate St John.

Some time after I finished the run and was sweating tremendously, Jia came in too and I asked her about the stupid St John's kid, and she said, Oh yes he said 100m left, but Sasa and I were like Nahh, lying to us as usual only, and ignored him. Why am I the one who always gets duped by people? Last year it was Leroy and Arkar with their YOU'RE ALMOST THERE! YOU'RE ALMOST THERE! RUN! RUN! this year it's some little Sec 2 kid.

But having said that, the run was really at quite a comfortable pace, so it was pretty much alright after all :)

After everything ended, we took a cab to Nicky's house. Sasa, Kum Boon and I flagged one down, but suddenly this other taxi reversed into our path and beckoned for us to get in, so we did, and the driver in the other taxi bearing down on us was like getting into the middle-finger mood. So I was like O.O and we all hurried into the cab. Dev, Amy, Jin Ning and Nicky got into another and they dropped Jin Ning off at AMK station. Ours reached first =)

We started RE4 again. Squealingly fun! I suppose it was hard on Nicky, who had like 2 heart attacks everytime he came across a boss fight or hordes of infested villagers armed with dynamites and chainsaws, but I'm sure he's strong and young at heart. I can't be bothered to go into detail because it would mean tedious explanations of how the game works and the missions we had to accomplish, but we died about 8 times because Ashley, the president's daughter whom Leon was supposed to save, kept getting killed. Short lifespan lah she.

Oh, and we had dinner at Nicky's house. I LOVE NICKY'S WONDERFUL MAID! She cooks the most appetizing meals, my God, lucky bastards Nicky and his family are. It is always sinfully UNHEALTHY, exactly the types of chow us teenagers should be stuffing our faces with =)

We got really into recounting all that had happened in 2/7, sharing all the hilarious anecdotes in class, like Heryanti and her hair flipping and her crush on Rama, and how she always made Dev go get her a chair because he was Dhevy's brother, and how the guys used to entertain themselves in class with soccer/the whale dartboard/water bottle sliding on the whiteboard ledge/kungfu fighting with the bamboo poles etc. Oh yes, Dev and Rama broke the broom and dustpan just so they could use the wooden poles to hantam each other. Lousy assholes. How I used to think of them as idiots...

And yeah well, the mean, nasty selves in us would not let a perfectly good occasion go by without bitching, so there was bitching, lots and lots of delightful bitching, even the guys bitched beautifully. We ended the session with some lame video clips of us *erhem* imitating several people, and several group photos =)

And about our sushi date, well, it went quite well until the end when Nicky and Jia started turning pale and looking crappy. Hahaha. I think we ate Africa's share, too. It was like, 52 plates in total, counting the 4 plates of watermelon and 3 bowls of cha soba and the eggy thing which I can't remember how to spell which both Nicky and Jia ordered. Sasa actually had lunch, the fool, because she'd forgotten (!!!) about our sushi date. So she ate only like 9 plates. But excluding that, this means that the 3 of us ate 52 - 9 = 43 plates and that's 14 plates for each of us.

Holy crap...

Anyway, halfway through the meal Nicky started scratching his left ear, complaining about how it was very itchy and his entire face turned red and his ear was redder, and he looked like he was going to die, and he looked like a confused monkey the way he was scratching so we all laughed ourselves silly, my God we must have laughed ourselves silly 300 times, and the manager was called Yeo Kiang Wee!

Ok that was random. Sasa stuck both her feet on the opposite seat, which was my and Nicky's, and suddenly in between plates of sushi Nicky saw her ghastly pale feet in the dim light under the table poking out from beneath the darkness and went MY GOD, thinking of the undead in Resident Evil, and I choked because I knew that was Sasa's feet but it really did look very freaky and decomposing. We all laughed ourselves silly at that too, for some reason.

Oh, after the english rememdial that day Jia and I went to collect my Geog file and Dev's racket at Pizza Hut. Then after that we made our way to Nicky's, and WE DID NOT EVEN EAT ANYTHING THERE. The first (and probably last) time we went to Nicky's, and did not eat. Marcus was like sitting in the room with his rice and chicken and egg (TWO SUNNY SIDES UP!) and luncheon meat, and we kept catching whiffs of the tantalizing aroma and I was going KILL ME mentally, because we had to keep our stomachs empty for the sushi later on, but it smelled so good!

When it was time to leave and meet Sasa, we waited like 20 minutes for 136, and I wanted to writher and cry, because it was so long and my stomach was digesting itself (ok, it wasn't, but still). When we finally did get to J8, Jia and I were like almost running to Sakae Sushi. It was quite embarrassing. I tell you when I grabbed my first coloured plate after they'd seated us I died and went to heaven =)

Ohhh I am a little tired to blog about today's March Games. But I shall persevere because I am resilient and hardy. Hmm, what to say, we some disagreements with several people, one being 3/5 over hantam bola, and one with Jia Hao from 4/6 over his umpiring of the 4/2 against 4/4 captain's ball match. Bloody hell I was royally pissed! Yesssss, I understand, believe me, how stressed you are to be one of the head honchos and have 400 different students running up to you and asking you what they should do in this matter in that matter at various times of the morning, but you were being so ridiculous! For one, it has ALWAYS been understood and accepted that in captain's ball, you get one captain, any gender, 3 boys and 3 girls on one team. The captain is also geenrally accepted TO BE THE ONE STANDING ON THE CHAIR CATCHING THE BALL AND IS NOT INVOLVED ON THE COURT. How can you suddenly twist things around and allow 4/2 to play with 1 girl as the captain with 4 boys and 2 girls on the court? And then you say you didn't tell us that because we didn't ask. GRR.

Though I was so mad at the unreasonable way things had unfolded I think 4/2 played quite well. Sadly they beat us. I think Natalie and April's coordination was power man. But GAH what is wrong with that Lester person? He is like. Banging into anything that is moving. Indeed I attritbute it to his haste to get the ball away from his opponent but I believe there is a way to do so without knocking half the opponent's team down in the process. AND being unapologetic about it later on.

Oh, and with 3/5, well it's a long and rightly stupid story, and you could come ask me about it if you want. All I have to say is, anyone who actually dares to insist that when you jump up and the ball hits your shin, you are not to be counted out because if you had been standing still, the ball would have hit your thigh and as hits above the knee are not counted, you can therefore continue playing IS AN IDIOT.

OH, the most gentlemanly guy I have ever met in my life is the defender from 4/8's captain's ball team! Because Jody had come up with a strategy for me to stand at the chair so the defender wouldn't be able to jump close enough to our captain to get the ball (as I would be sandwiched between them both), I did exactly that and the poor guy was such a gentleman that he didn't want to jump into me! He looked quite wu ke nai he and tried to do his best from the sides. I mean, most of the guys I've seen would simply plow right into you while they jump. He was being so nice I felt extremely mean and lousy -.-

Aiyah, won't mention 4/3 le lah. Just that I think it's a waste how friendship can be reduced to so little just because of some trivial, insignificant things.

Here's my revised homework list:

. 8 more Geog essay questions to go
. 4 math exam papers. whatever man!
. half a chinese compre
. 1 SS mindmap on something long, dull, and boring
. 2 SS essay questions
. 2 english essays
. bio timetable
. notes for sec 3 chapters!
. e math file corrections
. arrange lit file

Think that's about it.

Lingga says @#%$! at 6:04 PM

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

"In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you."

Fitzwilliam Darcy, Pride and Prejudice

I finished the book, finally (never mind that I skipped all the insignificant parts where they sat down and did nothing but talked). It is crappy, I am sorry to say. I must be exceptionally stupid because I certainly did not enjoy the book very much, or revel in its intelligence and subtle flair, and I certainly do not want to read the book a second and third time, to "discover new ironies and subtleties", thank you very much. Unless I'm really bored, I guess. For one, the language is annoying; how they talked and wrote like 200 years before is lame. Get to the goddamned point, man (the quote I have presented above is one of the most simple sentences in the book)! And, Jane Austen does not believe in paragraphs. What she believes in, are oodles and oodles of chunky sentences all depicting walks in the gardens or conversations at dinner. And she is not fond of dialogue. No, she prefers indirect speech. It is nothing like the contemporary novels I usually read, and not even my historical romances are like that. Yes, maybe the language is similiar, but bloody hell la, they got plot Pride and Prejudice no plot ok? Seriously, there is no RUNNING PLOT in the whole thing. It is merely a series of events after a series of events. Like TET. Gosh.

Oh yes, back to Fitzwilliam Darcy, who is known as Mr Darcy in the book. He is supposedly the "elusive lover" of Elizabeth Bennet, who is our heroine, she is a very likeable character, I admit. Darcy is quite alright too, being portrayed initially as arrogant and haughty but later turns out to be a rightly nice guy as insisted by all his servants and shit. We know they fall in love, because the book's blurb said so, but 300 pages later and almost at the end of the book, I flip a page wondering when the heck they're gonna get together, then next paragraph they're engaged. Bloody hell, WHEN? WHEN?? When did Elizabeth fall for Darcy?! Darcy was in love with Elizabeth all along, because he proposed to her halfway through the book and confessed (quote above), but when did Elizabeth begin to reciprocate?? God, it was so abrupt! Yes, we can tell she had began to dui Darcy you hao gan, but that is not the same as falling in love! Suddenly they are in love! It is not romantic at all, my God! And without romance, no ongoing plot and annoying language, this book is not worthy of reading at all!

Ok, maybe that was a little harsh. It's not all that bad, really, but gosh, IT IS NOT THE 1800s ANYMORE.

Not recommended for people with short attention spans, because you will lose your focus after the 4th sentence you read.

It's over, I'm upset, but I'll get over it.

Lingga says @#%$! at 7:18 PM

Monday, March 13, 2006

Brilliant, you stupid ass, brilliant. Go and get yourself sunburnt again right. Bloody hell.

So anyway, start of March Games today. 4/4 sent in 2 teams for captain's ball but we kept alternating team members anyway. I was without a doubt accurate in my inference a year back that Yongyuan and Wilson had powerful elevation prowesses like kangaroos or something like that because they are freaking pro man. Wait that didn't sound right. Lemme check out my archives hold on -

.
.
.

Ah, here it is.

"Yongyuan is this skinny atheletic flying machine who has elevation powers of the kangaroo (no wait that's James), I mean skinny atheletic flying machine who has godly interception skills and Wilson simply rocks at grabbing balls from others and actually, also has semi-godly interception skills, and Khairul is the evil walking sarcasm bin who snatches passes from innocent Sec 1s when they're not looking!"

- May 19th, 2005

Ok, so maybe I got it a bit mixed up. But yes, the logic is prevailing. I love my class =) I think all the guys are useful lah, like completely and utterly useful. Nicky was our captain this time because he was the tallest in the class and we needed all the height we could get in the battles we would encounter thereafter with freaks like that guy in 4/3, I'm sorry I dunno your name, who was guarding Nicky, and that pair was the only pair I've seen in my entire life of captain ball-playing to have the captain only one head taller than the defender, AFTER he stands on the chair -.- Anyway, we lost to 4/3, but more about that later.

Ohhhhhhhh, we beat 4/8!!! When the game first commenced, every single one of us on the court were literally staring. Trees, big, tall trees obstructing our vision. Jia said we were all practically stagnant on the court from her view off it, because we were too shocked by the HEIGHT we had to go up against in this game. So yes, the guys are very tall. Very, very, VERY tall. We were all quite apprehensive because last year we lost to 3/8 (this year's 4/8), and did not want to repeat our failure. BUT, true skill prevailed and we won! By one goal, but whatever man.

In the game against 4/3, Joanna was a very hesitant umpire, but I can't really blame her for that because I totally understand what she's going through. Thank you, Sharzwan (IS THAT HOW HE SPELLS HIS NAME? MY GOD, I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO PUT TOGETHER A SENSIBLE LOOKING SPELLING FOR 40 SECONDS), for being so damn tall and for having hands which dwarf every single one of ours. When I say dwarf, I mean dwarf. I was wondering how it'll be like if he accidentally slapped James's (who was defending him, the captain) head when catching the ball and if James's head would roll off. And there was some guy who kept tapping my ball. GRR I WOULD LIKE TO EMPHASIZE THIS FACT, FUCK YOU ALL BALL TAPPERS. I can condone any type of foul on the court, but I cannot fucking believe the assholes who PERSIST in tapping MY balls, MINE, thank you very much, when it is clearly NOT allowed, the balls which I so painstakingly jumped up and caught with MY bare hands, and if you want possession of the ball you can kindly go find another opportunity to jump up and snatch it away, but for the time being it is in MY hands and don't you dare TAP it away while it is in MY hands so you can grab it when I drop it, you lowdown LOSER.

Ok. Back to the guy who kept tapping my ball. I think it was Jiahao from 4/3. I don't know who the guy is man, but I will forever bear a grudge against him for daring to tap MY ball. And certain people from 4/6 and this indian guy from 4/2, too (haha I glared at him). I'm sorry, but I'm very adamant about this. TAPPING BALLS AWAY IS NOT ALLOWED IN CAPTAIN'S BALL; THIS IS NOT BASKETBALL, YOU DISORIENTED FOOLS.

Gah.

Alright, we lost to 4/3. I don't want to comment further on this delicate issue. Hmm, we lost to 5/1 too. But I think it was one loss per team. That's quite sad, because this means we have one down for each of us already. If only both the losses were for ONE team. But I don't think so.

But on a brighter note, we beat 4/1, 4/2, 4/6 and 4/8 =)

Oh oh, Michael went nuts in the 4/3 games and leapt onto Jiahao's back, stunning the poor guy completely. I mean, you would be too if some guy tried to sail over your head while you're passing the ball.

After the games (hantam bola will commence this Wednesday, and captain's ball will continue), Nicky and I went up to class to steal Sonia's files so we can copy her math corrections. However, she had unexpectedly brought them home already -.- Sad. I retrieved my Geog file, and we went to meet Dev at AMK Central for lunch at Pizza Hut. It was very fun as usual xD Nicky asked for ice water because he said Pepsi would not quench his thirst, so the waitress brought 3 glasses thinking we all wanted them, and so Nicky took his glass and gulped everything down at one go, and I was not surprised because I have seen how he treats his fruit juice at school. At the end of the meal however he had finished all 3 glasses including Dev's and mine so Dev was rather disgruntled. Haha. That boy (Dev) has can form like the widest variety of expressions on his face which makes me want to smack him because he's acting so spastic! And he has a mouth that emits whack-inducing noises, too. I proclaim Dev a walking nutcase.

Anyway, after lunch we all went home, and it was only in the third-floor corridor of my block then did I realise MY GEOG FILE WAS NOT IN MY ARMS.

It was back in Pizza Hut, in Ang Mo Kio, on the vacant chair I'd left it on.

Ohhh, I flipped and I let myself into the house and called Nicky and pleaded for help. We decided to in the end call 62353535 and ask for them to alert the AMK branch of my lost Geog file. It was only after I hung up after Nicky'd volunteered to do it for me (such a nice boy) then did I realise, heh heh, Dev's racket was on the same chair as my file too. So I called Dev and told him, and he was like, Oh, I didn't realise, and went on about how he would probably not have realised until the next time he was at Khatib wanting to play badminton again.

So yes, anyway finally we got it all settled, and I shall collect my file tomorrow morning when I go for English remedial (ENGLISH REMEDIAL.) in school (I skipped it this morning for the Games =P). TOMORROW IS A GREAT DAY.

It is Sakae-Sushi-Buffet-Eat-All-You-Can Day!!!

-OHMYGOD! My sister just came in and flaunted her stylish newly-dyed subtle brown locks which cost a staggering price of $120, and she says to me it is cheap already-

I am going to stuff myself with Sasa, Jia and Nicky, and I simply, simply cannot wait.

Lingga says @#%$! at 6:22 PM

Sunday, March 12, 2006

From left to right

Amy: Damn, Nicky's ceiling is so high. Why isn't my ceiling as high as Nicky's? Aww, I wish my ceiling was as high as Nicky's.
Lingga: Must.. look.. pensive..
Sasa: Wah! Flying crab! Yum.
Dev: My face is aching. I shall curl my lips to express my pain.
Kum Boon: O, wo de ai ren, ni zai he fang? (Oh, wherefore art thou, beloved lover?)
Nicky: *snore*

Lingga says @#%$! at 12:18 AM

Saturday, March 11, 2006

I have a lot a lot a lot a lot of homework. =(

Someone please TELL the teachers 7 days is really very little.

It is certainly not enough for FOUR freaking math papers.

Or the 101 other things they've assigned us.

I'm so desperate, I'm filling in my Preston Vocab Book (practices 1 - 150 to be completed) even as I talk to Sasa.

Update at 11.22pm

Bloody hell look at this.

A cow is a ______________ (herb) because it eats only vegetation.

HERBIVORE IS DERIVED FROM HERB?! IT IS? Why are they aksing us stupid questions like this? I swear, I nearly spat when I saw 'herb'. GAH I AM ONLY ON PRACTICE 12.

Things to do in holiday

homework
. some essay on how library materials have benefited me
. 2 a math papers, 2 e math papers (whatever man)
. some li jie wen da
. some jian bao (2) gan xiang because I finished the cloze passage already
. a shitload of chem worksheets on electrolysis
. like 10 bio mindmaps? I'm intending to simply hand in my bio notebook and just add on to it the chapters I don't have.
. a revision timetable Mrs Lim wants
. 10 geog essay questions, and all the MCQ questions from 2001 to 2005 on Population and Settlement
. finish differentiation worksheet
. STUPID RI COMPRE
. oh yeah, Preston Vocab Book, of course

miscellaneous
. Sakae Sushi. Stuff. Stuff. Stuff.
. bring all math files to Nicky's on tue and copy corrections and rearrange
. rearrange lit file and find dividers
. band concert! Sasa's 30 second solo, the sole reason why I paid 10 bucks for the ticket
. flare up.

Last update, I swear (12.03am)

Crap, I'm stopping work.

Lingga says @#%$! at 10:28 PM

i cannot be bothered to capitalize appropriately. another flag day today. but you know i was inspired to blog after reading carrie's blog? she blogs in such an.. appealing way.

amy had helpfully supplied me with the detail that we were to gather at 7am at ang mo kio mrt station, so i helpfully supplied jia with that. i had a hard time getting to bed the previous night because of all the stupid insects who have (HAVE, ARE STILL) invaded my house. therefore, it is understandable for me to press away the alarm on my handphone when it woke me at 6am, and quite so for me to wake up at 6.50 the next thing i knew. i flipped minorly and didn't wash my face. got mom to drive me there. my hair was a mess.

i reached at 7.13 or so. by then audrey had already told me that the meeting time was 7.30, not 7. so i wasn't late but early actually. poor jia wasted 8 bucks on a cab, reaching the station at 6.56am because she'd woken up late and had thought she'd be late.

the lady who briefed us was freaking cheerful. she had a voice straight out of a 10am cartoon show. she should be on hi-5. it is unbearable at 7.30am in the morning.

we were collecting for the singapore after-care association, a name i would utter continuously for the next 4hours to disinterested passers-by. it's to "help ex-offenders and their families get back on their feet", as written on the can.

it being an island-wide drive, we were actually allowed to ask for donations anywhere in singapore. jia, dev, audrey and i decided on novena. we settled somewhere outside novena square, a little up the road towards some church. i have discovered 3 facts:

1. novena people are far, far, far more generous than orchard road people.

2. especially those going to church.

3. when the bell chimes at 9am, everyone uses that as an excuse to not donate as they have to rush to church, even though they are not actually quickening their footsteps.

4. they also claim they will donate after the session, but they do not.

i met a lot of people who said god bless me to me. made me feel quite guilty because they are obviously praising me for my efforts to help these souls who need a chance to restart their lives and i am obviously only doing it for my CIP hours. i kept stressing the ex-offenders part, because i think people soften more upon seeing that. what with the yellow ribbon project being so dominant and so on.

oh yeah, there was this guy who greeted me like an old friend ("good morning! how are you?") when i asked for donations. i really thought he knew me or something. WHY do people do that? when i grow old, i will not scare flag bearers by acting weird, i will NOT.

this poor old man selling tissue politely requested for us to move away since we were wrecking his business. we responded by buying 16 packets of tissue from him. so nice right :)

anyway, we decided to move to help the poor guy. we actually went to united square, but can i say it is not sensible to be begging for money at 9am in the morning? do they not realise people don't shop at 9am in the morning? why were we asked to start work in the morning? it is unearthly and no one is fully awake.

we drifted over to tan tock seng hospital, for god's sake. TTS HOSPITAL. WHERE PEOPLE ARE DYING OF GRIEF BECAUSE OF THEIR LOVED ONES, AND WE WANT THEM TO PUT IN A BLOODY COIN. however, we did not linger long because we realised the mood was inappropriate. i was standing at the traffic light with my can on my shoulder and stoning at the roads when someone dropped a coin into my can ON MY SHOULDER and plucked a sticker off and i whirled around completely shocked and she went sorry and left with her sticker.

SHE DONATED WITHOUT ME ASKING! WITHOUT ME EVEN OFFERING HER A CAN! A CAN THAT WAS ON MY SHOULDER! I LOVE HER!

instead, we went back to the station and contemplated other locations, like bugis and lavender. lavender where we can ambush all those people making passports. just stand outside the building and jab tin cans at them :) however, we did not. we settled on bugis afterall, intending to maybe claim territory and squat outside the national library. however however, we found out after we got there that bugis had been ENTIRELY MONOPOLIZED already. by adults and other schools raising funds for the same cause. mei you wo men de rong shen shi chu. so we went back to novena after about 20 discouraging minutes.

by then, however, novena had been taken over too. apparently people have realised that the church-going bunch at novena are generous souls for ages already. there were a lot of those associations who have physically-disabled people selling tidbits and stuff like that, stationed outside the church. also these 3 girls who had taken my position at the intersection near the church. one of the adults doing flag day even told me to wait for the next batch of people who finish their session. but oh well. we settled outside novena square instead, directly at the entrance.

there are 3 doors. jia, audrey and i all took one each. dev was a distance away from us and he had the entire traffic of church people after their morning session to pounce on. i took the left one, closest to the escalators leading from the mrt (but which are usually deserted) and the bus stop. you see, the 2 escalators are separated by a wide stretch of staircase. if i stand at the left escalator, people move towards the right. if i stand at the right, they move towards the left. it is a lose lose situation because i lose them when they step onto the platform leading to the escalator. they just take the escalator and turn around gleefully waving at me because HAHA I GOT AWAY. ok they did not, but you know they totally want to.

i realised that people who just get off cabs are potential targets with change in their hands, so i swooped down on everyone of them alighting. true enough, they all donated, and donated all the change they'd gotten back from the cab driver. gosh, i am smart. however, for a while there weren't any cabs depositing passengers, so i had to go back to moping outside long john's begging for donations. i think those people in long john's were watching me. this desperate-looking schoolgirl who made a face everytime someone didn't donate. seriously, i was so byl. i felt so bad when i got this old auntie to donate. i wasn't sure if she understood english. i don't think she even understood chinese! she looked a little worse-for-the-wear and not exactly well-off, but still she dug out some coins for me and put them in, smiling innocently at me like i was the sweetest grand-daughter. OHMYGOD, I CONNED AN OLD LADY OUT OF HER MARKETING MONEY.

there were 2 chinese women who asked me about my cause in chinese, and i was stumbling over myself trying to explain in CHINESE (i can do normal conversation, sure, but explaining a CAUSE? i almost said huang si dai JING hua ok), and when they heard it was for ex-offenders, they went "aiyah, give them chance also no use, they won't turn over a new leaf etc", and went on in vein for some time, and i'm like, er, nod nod, nod, because how do you reply to that?

oh, there was this family of 5 i approached. the mother gave me this black look that clearly said "back off", but the father tried to produce some coins. he looked quite helpless when he couldn't find any but a 10 cent coin, and he was very bu hao yi si because i had already given his 3 kids a sticker each (tricks of the trade - just give the kids a sticker first before the parents produce any money and they can't possibly make them give it back to you, so they'll definitely donate), and he was donating 10 cents. so he went, i'll donate after i get some change. i think he didn't expect me to be still there after they finished their business in the mall. but i was neh neh neh. i even purposely showed some recognition ("oh!") when i saw them. xD so he gave his son a fistful of change (his name was matt. such a nice name. sensible father he is. not like those who named their sons harold or edward or whatever) and his son wandered over to me looking confused and dropped them in.

there was this smart young woman, who, when her son took a sticker i devilishly offered him even before the woman had taken out the coins, went, "zhihao, don't take the sticker before you donate." haha maybe she was on to me xD

oh yeah, rude people. many simply ignored me and did not acknowledge my existence. IT WILL NOT KILL YOU TO SAY NO POLITELY, OK? some heard me out but that was it. oh oh, there were many who believed the "if you don't see her, she don't see you!" rule. they refused, REFUSED eye contact with me until i shamelessly hurried up to them and went EXCUSE ME, smiled sweetly and delivered my lines. haha it was quite amusing actually. you can almost see them trying to mentally psych themselves into believing that. "fuck she's coming i'll just look away isn't that tree interesting i don't see her i don't see her oh shit there she is"

there was an auntie who seemed completely engrossed in what long john's was offering (the ads outside the restaurant) when she saw me approaching. and there was once who refused to turn around even though i said excuse me to her back like 4 times :(

as usual, soles died and went to hell some way through all that sweat and tears and rejection.

i shall go to novena for all my consequent flag days :)

i went home, simmed for a bit, went to bed at 2 and woke at 6. it is tiring to do good deeds...

i shall blog about thursday's cross-country soon?

Lingga says @#%$! at 9:05 PM

Saturday, March 04, 2006

My eyes are acting funny. Maybe they can't take the onslaught of Eye-Mo. Too strong for them or whatever. My eyelids are drrooooping... And I am sleepy and typing with my eyes closed.

Oh my God, All American Girl 2: Ready Or Not is SO FREAKING NC-16. I don't know if Meg Cabot lost it one day when she woke up and decided that her teenage readers are mature enough to deal, or something, but it is so so so inappropriate for 12 year old kids! I think if I read it when I was 12 I would become completely warped. Ok, there are no explicit details or horny sex scenes, and she doesn't come straight out and say stuff, but the THINGS she discusses! Oh, my mind blushes at the memory. And there is this particular, er, procedure Meg Cabot describes, involving bathtubs and running water, and it is just SO VERY VULGAR.

Get the book.

FOXTROT IS HILARIOUS. I don't mind if people rent 45 Foxtrot compilations for me on my birthday and I read all of em in 3 weeks and go blind.

Fucking mosquitoes. They attack me when I am alone and unprotected in bed. I must have at least 20 bites on simply both my arms. And the thing is, they protrude, alright. Those bites are very obvious and lumpy, like knnjdg. And they itch. I can't go anywhere in my house and sit still for 15 minutes without being harrassed by one of THEM.

I just went out to light the mosquito coil and have put them in my room. I hope every one of those irritating little buggers DIE.

I'M NOT DOING MY HOMEWORK! I love not doing homework again =) I hope the hols roll around quickly so I can sleep in every day! Even if it IS just for one pathetic week.

Ok have lost my mood for blogging what with so many mosquito terrorist attacks. It is 9.51pm.

Lingga says @#%$! at 8:38 PM

Friday, March 03, 2006

Once again, I have missed my A1 for english by 1 mark. It's a horrible 74 again. It's been a horrible 74 for the longest time. Why can't it be a 75 already? Kel doesn't need those extra 4 marks from her 79. She should just give me one so I can get an A1 for english for the first time in ages!

When Ms Heng distributed those grammar tests and announced that I had full marks, I couldn't believe it because that meant a 76/100 overall. Then she held on to my paper and used it to go through the questions on the visualizer, and I knew it straight away - byebye, A1. An impending sense of doom had seized me and I knew, for some reason, there would be an error she'd spot while she went through my paper. I sat on my chair full of nerves. 9 questions went by and still the coast was clear. I began to relax. Then she flipped to the last bloody page, took one look at the last question and went, "Actually, Yiling got this wrong." Everyone went awwww. Ms Heng crossed out the 20 and wrote an 18. I died.

Oohhhh, I screwed up royally for Social Studies. I passed by 1/2 mark. Mr Neo put up this DAMAGE CONTROL list on the notice board and split the name list into several sections - a)inference, b)reliability and c)usefulness, representing the 3 different questions which tested the above skills. Anyway, I had 2 crosses under (a) and 1 under (c). Layjia had a :( under (b). Hahaha I thought that was hilarious. Several people earned scrawled NAIVEs.

Anyway, Mr Neo also wrote "English expression" next to my name. I suppose it means the way I express myself is inappropriate or something. I have no idea what he is talking about, but I guess I do have an inkling, because above the phrase I wrote "shines light on (this matter)" (meaning you find out/understand more), he asked me what kind of light. I think he read it in the positive/negative light way. I'm quite speechless lah because really, what do you say in reply to that?

But anyway, Lit saved my ass this time. I swear to God, I went out of the classroom after taking the paper convinced I would fail. Having not expected the question ("We are in complete control of our destiny. To what extent does this statement ring true in The English Teacher? Support your -somethingIcan'trememberwhat- with -moresomethingIcan'tremember- at least 2 characters from the novel") at all, I was clueless as to how to start and finally dissected it like how you do a comprehension question and went about explaining as best as I could. By explaining I mean rambling on senselessly trying to sound intelligent. Nicky insisted that I had an innate ability to sound professional even on paper and will use words which reflect my ultra-confidence. I don't know where he got that mentality from but I think it's a very good thing.

I did pretty ok for both my Math this term. It being Term 1 and all. I usually start failing only in the second term. Ironically, I got 61 for each. Though as usual like everyone else that score could be several marks higher if it hadn't been for my persistent blatant stupidity (careless mistakes, but of course), I am pretty much satisfied. It is after all miraculously a B not a C and a 4 not a 5 or 6. I think Differentiation is pretty alright. Considering the fact that we're to do it for the whole of next term, this is a positive and encouraging sign. However, I have noticed this disturbing trend in all mathematics topics, that is, when you think you have gotten to this point in the topic that is so tough it can't possibly be tougher (or more annoying), the next day your math teacher nonchalantly introduces to you something 10 times worse.

Bio and Geog were alright. I do like Mdm Neo! She's adorable. And she keeps giving out Hello Panda in class.

Oh yeah HIGHER CHINESE. Haha it was a nonsensical paper. I could barely understand a single word of the comprehension passage (which, I don't care what Mr Tay says, was incredibly chim, and just because it was a letter to the chinese forum in the papers doesn't mean it's easy to comprehend, it was still incredibly chim and the writer is just weird to write something the average person probably won't even understand anyway). I think I'll get a B3. IF he doesn't use the compo where he deducted 5 entire marks (that is just wrong ok! He is only allowed to deduct 2 marks max!!) for the 10 wrong words i had.

Chem was bull. Grr.

I shall update soon enough, I suppose =)

Lingga says @#%$! at 9:59 PM